miss universe

Think I've found a good approach for this one. I'm ending it where I'm ending it, because it could easily get overgrown, and become something of a novella rather than a sketch.
Prompt:
Imagine the "Miss Universe" pageant using beings from all over the universe.
----oooo---
Hands and feet chained together, Heero leaned against the plain white washed wall as he sat on the unadorned bench bolted along the hall.

He looked to the food tray being handled next to him and smirked as a frantic blond woman, with poofy hair and shapely curves, used the various things there to hide a thing that looked suspiciously like a over-sturdy pair of scissors. The rolls and mostly overstuffed sandwiches sat over the sharp pointy bit; and the leafy lettuce and a great pile of purple grapes draped over the bright yellow safety handle, but Heero could still easily see the thing she was trying to hide: Could the woman be more obvious in her attempts to hide escape tools for someone?

Heero looked away and down the hall. Several guards were chatting at the Door, and laughed at some joke. He heard,"the poor bastard...but he knew better.." And knew it was he who was the topic of the conversation. He sighed.

If only he hadn't had insulted the town mayor's wife all those years ago.. Was it his fault she was a short and plump woman with no apparent neck? If only she didn't remind him oh so much of a human sized toad! But then, who knew the mayor would manage to get elected to head something like this?

He heard a muffled scream, and winced. Something wet and red struck the windows of the Doors at the hall's very end. It looked rather like blood to him, and he swallowed his bile.

The woman next to him rose to her feet and straightened her shoulders. With her head held high, she strode to the door of the holding cell halfway down the hall, heels echoing along the corridor. A guard opened the door for her, and eyed the tray she was holding suspiciously.

"Next!" He heard called out, and he turned his attention away from the woman.

"I said next!" The guard said impatiently, and looked to a cupboard. "Heero Manticore."

A meaty man in uniform roughly lifted him to his feet by the elbow, and he squeaked out,

"Hey! Watch it!"

As he was half dragged along the hall, the poofy-hair woman watched him with sad eyes. He noticed the guard before her munching on the items on the tray.

Through the Doors at the end of the hall he was roughly shoved, and he caught his balance on unsteady legs. As the doors banged shut behind him, he noticed that the room was just as pristine white as the hall.

He looked back at the square windows impeded in the Doors, certain he would see something grisly. Only, there was nothing but glass and steel.

A light came on, and he turned. The source, about the twice the size of a large door, was a great window. Up at the top hung a brightly lit banner which read: "Miss Universe Pageant", below which he could see a sort of black platform-- perhaps a stage?

A tinny voice began to speak from somewhere in the ceiling, he looked up reflexively only to eye the speakers set there.

"Congratulations on being selected! Welcome, honored Judge, to the Miss Universe Pageant, where beings from all over the universe compete to be declared the most beautiful."

Heero spied a chair, a fancy wood carved number, with overstuffed cushion of red velvet. He settled himself into it uneasily, and lowered his brows when he felt that the cushions were slightly damp beneath him.

"As your predecessor was unfortunately unable to continue, it is our great hope that you will choose the most beautiful being of all."
Sent via a stray supercharged nano particle of unobtainium....